Unless you're one of those 75% off candy hounds, you're probably sick of Valentine's Day offerings at this point. I've never just celebrated Valentine's Day on its own. I'm pretty sure everyone else is in the same boat where the first two weeks of February basically comprise a slow incline to the grand bash. In the days leading up, I've tried to keep my intake light but always fall prey to the special candies and baked goods everyone's grandma seems to churn out. And you know I'm a sucker for limited edition snacks! So to change up the game, I figure you could all use a break. Here's a product that will swear you off Valentine's candy, and all candy, forever.
This is yet another quirky Japanese candy that, like New Girl, pushes and pushes and never knows when to quit in its relentless search for your validation of its quirkiness. Yes, Japan, thank you for the adorable mascots. And the candy equation below detailing exactly how this two-part confection works. Oh, and the brightly colored package. I can deal with that because typically when this happens, the inside product is delightful as well as strange. But this is a new low, Japan.The strangely patriotic Eagle Confection Company, which may or may not actually exist outside of this package, brings us this creepy combination of tomatoes and white chocolate today in a fit of amateur science pairing the "harmony of sweet and sour tomato and white chocolate" per the package's explanation. And yes, just in case you looked at the large tomato in chocolate on the package and thought, "I bet this is actually gooseberries in ranch dressing!" there are not one, and nor two, but four different representations of this combination on the front of the package, including but not limited to a soothing tomato pattern that could just as easily double as a Windows 7 default background. Did I mention these were found in a subway station?
Out of the bag, they look relatively innocuous, like something you'd buy on etsy from some homemaker in Indiana. To their credit, they look exactly as they are presented on the bag. However, in actuality, they are some of the strangest, least appealing things I have consumed in the history of this blog. They have a cloying scent that tricks the brain into thinking they're actually sweet, but the low quality of the white chocolate and the tomatoes inside display a disappointing savory flavor with a salty, jammy aftertaste and a lingering fishiness on the tongue. They taste like chalk, salt, flour, and soy sauce, in that order. The coating crumbles easily and doesn't melt but dissolves, leaving behind a chalky texture difficult to wash away with a glass of water.
While these were certainly different than the standard snacks one would find in the US or even in Japan, they lacked the proper execution of flavors that makes their whackier counterparts so desirable. Eating these was a bit tricky, like accidentally pouring sugar on sundried tomatoes instead of salt, and didn't feel even remotely pleasurable or fun outside of the novelty of eating chocolate-covered vegetables.
Labels: 1, asian, candy, chocolate, snack